Shifting Gazes (Maria & Kanon’s Side)
Maria’s Side
On a Saturday afternoon, Maria sat in the passenger seat of her mother’s car, having been roped into helping with shopping. She gazed absentmindedly out the window, letting out a small sigh as she wished to be home already.
“Maria, just wait here for a bit, okay? I’ll be back soon.”
She nodded lightly at her mother’s words and was left alone in the car. With the engine off, a calm silence enveloped her surroundings. Looking outside, she noticed the serene Saturday scenery—people walking happily down the sidewalk with shopping bags in hand.
—It was at that moment.
Her eyes suddenly caught sight of two familiar figures.
“Huh… Subaru-kun?”
Through the car window, she saw a boy’s familiar back crossing the intersection. Despite the crowd of people around him, she recognized him instantly. Holding her breath, Maria squinted to get a better look.
Beside him… was Chiharu.
She wore a light dress and was speaking to Subaru with a bright smile while walking slightly ahead of him. Occasionally, she’d glance back, and even from a distance, Maria could tell Subaru was replying in his usual curt but slightly shy manner.
“…They said they were going to the salon together, didn’t they?”
Maria whispered to herself, trying her best to stay calm. She had heard from Chiharu herself on Friday that she was taking Subaru to a hair salon. It wasn’t something unexpected. Chiharu was her friend, after all, and Maria knew she had a caring personality.
However, the sight of them now—
It looked almost like they were on a date.
Subaru’s hair, slightly trimmed and giving him a different vibe, caught Maria off guard. When she first saw him, she couldn’t help but think he looked much more “handsome” than usual—a realization that even surprised her. But what held her attention now wasn’t Subaru’s new look. It was Chiharu, walking beside him.
Though they were just walking side by side, they seemed unusually happy. Whenever Chiharu laughed, Subaru would mutter something, only to relax his expression slightly.
“…They look like they’re really getting along.”
A faint sting pricked Maria’s chest.
—No. They’re just friends hanging out. Chiharu probably doesn’t think of Subaru that way. Maria tried to convince herself of that. Yet, deep down, another voice whispered otherwise.
“I’ve never seen them like this before…”
Chiharu lightly tugged Subaru’s arm and stopped in front of a shop window. She seemed to be saying something fun, and Maria saw Subaru smile awkwardly in response.
—They look just like a couple.
Before she knew it, Maria’s hands were clenched tightly on her lap.
“…What am I even doing?”
She lowered her gaze, muttering silently to herself. It wasn’t as if Chiharu had done anything wrong. She was cheerful, considerate, and liked by everyone. That’s just who she was, which naturally made it easy for her to spend time with someone like Subaru.
—Compared to her, what about me?
Quietly, Maria averted her gaze. Her interactions with Subaru were limited to occasional conversations at school. They weren’t childhood friends or anything like that, and they didn’t even share many common interests. Yet, to Maria, Subaru was—someone she couldn’t ignore.
“Ugh, seriously…”
She leaned back in her seat and stared at the car ceiling.
—No matter how much I worry about it, nothing’s going to change.
When she glanced out the window again, the two of them were walking toward the shopping mall.
Watching their figures grow smaller and smaller in the distance, a sudden sense of urgency welled up within her.
“…I need to be more proactive.”
Maria’s whisper was firmer than she expected, carrying a surprising sense of determination.
—Because, at this rate…
“I’ll lose him.”
She continued silently in her mind, clenching her hands tightly once more.
Chiharu wasn’t doing anything wrong. She was just being her natural, kind self. Maria knew that. But seeing her stand beside Subaru made an unshakable unease bubble up inside her.
“Next time… maybe I’ll invite Subaru-kun myself.”
—If Chiharu could do it, then surely, Maria had the right to as well.
Outside the window, the flow of people had thinned out, leaving a peaceful stillness. Maria sat upright and took a small breath.
“…Alright.”
Just then, the car door opened, and her mother returned, carrying shopping bags.
“Sorry for the wait, Maria! Took longer than I thought.”
“It’s fine. No problem.”
Maria smiled as usual, but inside, a small flame had ignited—different from before.
—Next time, I’ll take the initiative.
With that resolve, Maria blushed slightly as she pictured Subaru’s retreating figure once more.
“…I’ll do my best.”
Her determination was spoken so softly it could barely be heard, but her heart was brimming with newfound strength.
Kanon’s Side
On Saturday evening, Kanon silently walked through the crowded streets near the station. Beside her was Reo, chattering away in his usual carefree tone.
“Kanon, I’m starving. Wanna stop by that café?”
“Oh, sure… I don’t mind.”
Kanon’s reply lacked energy. Today had been a date with Reo, starting with a movie in the morning, followed by time at a hotel—a day spent together.
Of course, that might be normal for a date. But lately, something about their time together felt off.
He always prioritized what he wanted to do. The movies he wanted to see, the places he wanted to go, the food he wanted to eat. Reo would state his preferences without hesitation, and Kanon would simply go along with them.
—Even though I wasn’t that interested in today’s movie.
That dissatisfaction simmered quietly in her chest.
“Kanon, wasn’t that movie awesome? The action scenes were insane.”
Reo grinned as he pulled her closer by the shoulder. Instinctively, Kanon flinched away.
“Oh… yeah. It was impressive.”
“What’s with the low energy? Wanna stop by my place next?”
His casual tone made Kanon frown slightly. They had just left the hotel, and here he was bringing up something like that again. She stifled the urge to sigh.
—Lately, Reo hasn’t considered my feelings at all.
When they first started dating, it was thrilling and fun. After feeling bored with her calm and steady relationship with Subaru, Kanon had found Reo’s passionate approach refreshing.
But now, something felt different.
—Couldn’t he at least meet me halfway sometimes?
She whispered this thought silently in her heart, biting her lip.
—Subaru-kun would never have done this.
Suddenly, old memories surfaced in her mind. Subaru always prioritized Kanon’s feelings. Whether it was deciding on a date spot or choosing a restaurant, he would smile warmly and say, “Wherever you’d like to go is fine.”
That memory, juxtaposed with her time with Reo now, only made her heart more restless.
—No. I can’t think like this.
Kanon shook her head lightly, as if trying to dispel the thought. She and Subaru had already broken up. There was no going back, nor did she want to.
And yet—
“…Huh?”
In the middle of the crowded street, she suddenly spotted a familiar figure.
Kanon’s feet froze in place.
“Kanon? What’s up?”
Reo peered at her curiously, but Kanon wasn’t paying attention. Her eyes were fixed on the figure ahead—it was Subaru.
“Wait… Subaru-kun?”
He was walking with Chiharu. They weren’t doing anything remarkable, just walking together, but something about them seemed different.
—His hair… it’s shorter.
Kanon unconsciously held her breath.
Subaru’s hair was usually left to grow unchecked, giving off a somewhat careless impression. But now, it was neatly trimmed, giving him a clean, slightly mature look.
Even his outfit was different. A simple shirt and jacket, yet it suited him perfectly.
“…You’ve got to be kidding.”
Kanon stood frozen, her gaze fixed on Subaru.
Beside him, Chiharu was happily chatting away. Subaru, too, though still curt as ever, was smiling shyly.
—I’ve never seen him like this before.
Having spent so many years with Subaru as childhood friends, Kanon thought she knew everything about him.
But the Subaru in front of her now looked like someone else entirely.
—Subaru-kun has changed.
Thinking back, perhaps it started during the BBQ. That was the first time she saw a different side of him—laughing and joking with Maria and Chiharu. Somehow, he felt distant.
“Kanon? What’s wrong? Why’d you go quiet all of a sudden?”
Reo looked at her suspiciously.
“Oh, it’s nothing.”
Kanon quickly forced a smile and looked away.
—No. Subaru is just the past. I’m with Reo now.
She repeated this to herself, but the unease stirring in her chest wouldn’t go away.
As she watched Subaru and Chiharu disappear into the shopping mall, Kanon let out a small sigh.
—It feels like Subaru-kun is getting farther and farther away.
“Kanon, are you sure you’re okay? You’re not feeling sick?”
Reo asked, concern in his voice. Kanon brushed it off with a quick “I’m fine”.
Even while walking beside Reo, her mind was occupied by thoughts of someone else.
—Am I… falling for Subaru-kun again?
The moment the thought crossed her mind, Kanon shook her head in panic.
“No, that’s not it… That can’t be it.”
But even as she denied it, her words felt hollow.
Subaru seemed so far away now. Yet deep down, she wondered—was the real problem that she was the one who couldn’t catch up to him?
Realizing this, Kanon bit her lip softly.
“Kanon? Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
Walking next to Reo, Kanon cast her gaze into the distance once more.
—I thought I wanted someone who would put me first.
That’s why I chose Reo. And yet, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t erase Subaru’s presence from her heart, leaving her feelings in turmoil.