A Person Named Shinjou Saya
Even after I got home, I couldn’t bring myself to do anything.
Just like in middle school, I had become the student council president again, but today I took the day off, saying I wasn’t feeling well.
Lately, I kept finding excuses to skip student council work or ask someone else to handle it. I had been doing that entirely because I wanted to restore my relationship with Yuuki-kun.
I knew I couldn’t keep skipping any longer, so starting tomorrow, I would have to handle my student council duties properly again.
Back in middle school, Yuuki-kun and I were both in the student council, and I had believed we were pretty close. I relied on him. I thought I trusted him, yet because of the bad rumors about him and everything piling up, I couldn’t trust him completely and things ended up the way they did.
“So could you stay out of my life? From now on, for the rest of your life?”
I wanted to strike the part of me that felt happy even for a moment when he said he would forgive me. Yuuki-kun might never forgive me for anything I’ve done.
But I still have to make things right with him.
I knew that Yuuki-kun had been suffering back in elementary school, yet even knowing that, I couldn’t fully trust him then.
Even someone as foolish and dull as me understands that I ended up hurting him even more, and I know I should never have done that.
Only regret kept building up.
I couldn’t trust him completely, and that must have caused everything. Because he was too kind, I misunderstood.
I misunderstood and thought he had forgiven me, that he didn’t care anymore.
But Yuuki-kun must have just been enduring it. He couldn’t take it anymore and that’s why he became the way he is now.
I’m the one who gave him such a deep wound, and I have to atone for that sin. Even if Yuuki-kun said he forgave me, I’d still have to keep doing everything I can for him.
Because I’m responsible for breaking him.
That’s why, if anyone tries to break Yuuki-kun any further, I have to protect him. Because I’m responsible, because I have to atone.
I have to protect Yuuki-kun this time. Because I’ve already committed one sin, I have the duty to protect him properly.
“…Could it be…”
The thoughts that had been spinning around in a muddled swirl suddenly cleared.
Is it possible that that woman is the one who made Yuuki-kun the way he is now? That might be true. Every woman who used to be around him had caused him harm. If I apply that pattern, then maybe she’s the one who made him the way he is now.
Of course, that ex-girlfriend Ayaka must have broken Yuuki-kun too, but that woman might have as well.
The weight of romantic feelings, the responsibility of breaking another person, and the unnecessary sense of duty inside me.
All sorts of emotions became mixed together.
In the dark room, there was no one left to reach out a hand to the girl sitting alone.