Chapter 28 End: The Season of Endings and Beginnings
“Nnggiiihhhhh!!”
I was writhing in agony in my old bedroom at my parents’ house in Japan, which I’d returned to for the first time in several years.
It was a kind of suffering I’d tasted more than enough even in a foreign land, but once I came back here, its intensity shot up to a level that could only be described as mental collapse.
“Uunngwiiihhhhh!!”
Clutching my head, I arched into a full bridge, thrusting my hips skyward and twitching uncontrollably.
“You’re loud, Niisan… What are you even doing? Are you insane?”
My stepsister Chris barged in, throwing the door open without knocking.
“Yeah, that’s right! I’ve gotta go insane just to survive this!”
Being here makes all those detestable memories from the past come rushing back, trying to kill me.
“Are you really okay with that? Tomorrow’s Kanae-san and Yukiya-san’s wedding, you know…”
Chris added that I should please refrain from any mentally unstable, stalker-like outbursts.
“Like hell I would! No way!”
Of course I wouldn’t. The reason I’d been suffering this whole time was because of my own pitch-black, irredeemable personal history…!!
“Nnggibibibihhh!!”
Once again, I remembered another past screw-up and let out a death scream.
A black history only truly becomes hell once you sober up and fully recognize it.
It all started with a lovey-dovey photo sent to me by my childhood friend couple back in high school. When I saw it back then, I was shattered.
After that, I graduated high school in a near-zombie state, then somehow started living together with a female friend who pretended to be my girlfriend just to provoke Kanae. While helping out with my parents’ work, I finished college and, thanks to a connection, managed to land a job.
After breaking once and then experiencing ordinary things as ordinary things, I finally sobered up.
Work, daily life, the future. Faced with overwhelming reality, I couldn’t stay trapped in middle school syndrome forever.
And once that happened, what inevitably came crashing down on me was my past. A parade of painfully cringeworthy words and actions, all committed by myself, that stained my youth pitch black.
The moment I truly recognized it, I broke out in a cold sweat, shivered with chills, then burst into loud sobs. I agonized over my embarrassing past and spent many sleepless nights.
Even now, the aftereffects are severe, and it’ll probably take many years for them to fade.
Honestly, sometimes I think it might’ve been better if I’d stayed a lifelong “loner introvert,” but the two words “common sense” won’t let me indulge that thought.
And because of that, my self-mockery never stops.
Huh? Seriously, what was I even doing back then? What’s a loner introvert anyway? A harem? A cheat build? Am I overpowered or what!?
A friend once told me, “You were popular because you’ve got a good face,” and only now does that really sink in.
Come to think of it, even the light novels I used as references were just stories where the good-looking, highly capable protagonist was popular because, of course, he was.
Worse, depending on how you look at it, it’s like hiding and faking your own ability under the excuse of being a loner introvert, then smugly taking revenge on the people you fooled while declaring justice on your side. What a rotten personality. How painfully cringey.
And that painfully cringey development was exactly what I was aiming for back then.
“It’s too much! This is way too much!!”
I rolled around on the floor.
“Are you really okay? You’re not going to do anything weird during the ceremony, right? Like messing with Kanae-san or something…”
Chris’s voice was laced with suspicion.
“There’s no way I would! It’s a wedding, you know!? It was settled ages ago, and honestly, I never had a chance from the start.”
Back then, driven by my own desires, I was trapped in a dangerous obsession where anything Kanae did, even things I wouldn’t have cared about if another girl did them, felt like affection directed at me.
Of course, now I understand that whatever feelings Kanae might’ve had toward me weren’t romantic. At best, it was just admiration.
“Besides, I’ve got a partner now too. I don’t have any lingering obsession with my childhood friend anymore.”
After staring at me intently, Chris relaxed her expression with a small snort.
“I’ll choose to believe that’s true, for now.”
As expected, I don’t have much credibility.
“That said, with the way you are now, you might actually be able to pull off a loner introvert harem.”
At those words, I squealed like a pig.
“Fugh!? D-don’t dig at old wounds…”
Even hearing those words is traumatic now.
“I know I’m one to talk, but since you’re only going to marry one person anyway, it’s more constructive to quickly align values with a single partner and deepen mutual trust.”
Thinking about it that way, Yukiya and Kanae were extremely rational.
I took out my phone and looked at the two-shot image they’d once sent me.
Yukiya looked bashful, while Kanae wore a blissfully melted smile. It’s a good photo. Back then, I’d fainted from the shock, but now I could look at it with a warm smile.
At tomorrow’s after-party, I think I’ll put this image up big on the screen and celebrate with everything I’ve got.
And with that, I’ll put another full stop on my damned, detestable black history…!
Even though I’d attended weddings before, this was my first time being the one getting married, and it was nerve-wracking from start to finish.
Especially since I’m set to inherit my family’s construction business someday, I’d been helping out and making connections since college. Because of that, I had a lot of guests for someone fresh out of school, which only made me more anxious.
Thanks to that mental fatigue, the things I remember most vividly from the ceremony are Kanae’s divine bridal appearance and adorable reactions, and Souta’s tearful breakdown after coming all the way from overseas.
Kanae, the bride and star of the ceremony, was unsurprisingly beautiful like a goddess. At the reception, she kept perfect posture and moved with polished grace.
However, in reality…
“Y-Yuki-kun… I-I’m so nervous, okay…!”
Kanae, who was sitting next to me at the reception, flashed me a weak, pitiful smile the moment the venue dimmed for one of the presentations.
Apparently, she’d been tense as a board.
Seeing that reminded me that Kanae was still the same cute Kanae, and I remember feeling deeply soothed by it.
And then there was Souta’s tearful display.
At the reception, Souta enthusiastically took photos, but with alcohol involved, he was apparently completely drunk from the very start of the after-party.
Because of that, some acquaintances from high school who joined the after-party teased him about his past behavior, and Souta ended up crying, getting angry, apologizing, and generally becoming very emotional.
According to a video his sister happened to record…
`“Snff… what was I even doing back then…! If you’re gonna call someone a loner introvert, you’re the loner introvert! I really regret it, I was wrong!”
In the end, they apparently made up, but maybe riding that emotional high, Souta was so moved by the presentation he’d planned himself that he burst into tears yet again.
The two-shot image of me and Kanae that I’d sent long ago appeared blown up on the venue’s screen, and Souta was the first to start bawling, shouting, “I’m so glad! I’m so glad!”
After a moment of stunned silence, I think the reactions were about twenty percent sympathetic tears and eighty percent warm, indulgent smiles. For the record, Kanae and I were in the twenty percent.
Looking at the photos from that wedding now, it really feels deeply moving.
“Ahh… I really did get rejected at the start, didn’t I?”
A few years ago, back in high school, Kanae rejected me once.
But after that, Kanae closed the distance with overwhelming momentum from her side, going from a childhood friend with unrequited feelings, to my most beloved girlfriend, then to my fiancée for only a short time, and that relationship came to an end yesterday.
Many relationships ended and began again, but the relationship between Kanae and me that started yesterday is one we have to continue as if it has no ending.
“I’ve gotta do my best…!”
Just as I was renewing my resolve, a voice reached my ears.
“Yuki-kuun, let’s watch the wedding video over heeere~”
Kanae’s relaxed, drawn-out voice drifted over.
Because of that, I ended up being healed by Kanae yet again, after I’d been tensing up and shouldering everything on my own.
With my face completely slack, I muttered something like, well, we’re newlyweds, you know? as a flimsy excuse before replying.
“I’m coming~!”
Letting the corners of my eyes droop in a gooey smile, I headed toward Kanae.
I called out to Yuki-kun, and we watched the wedding video on the living room TV.
“Oh, you even got this ready for us? Thanks.”
I’d just tried hooking up the digital camera to the TV by copying what I’d seen, but I’m happy he praised me.
“Ehehe~ I was just copying what Dad does though. I mean, I’m really sorry. I dragged you all the way to my parents’ place so suddenly…”
Even though I’m the one who got married, what does it even mean to bring my husband back to my parents’ house the day after the wedding? I think that myself too.
“Uu, Onee-chan couldn’t come to the wedding, and Dad and Mom are both so busy…”
Because the due date for my sister’s third child was moved up, she couldn’t attend the ceremony, and of course, as soon as the wedding ended, my dad and mom went straight to see her.
Well, up to that point it’d be fine, but then they asked us newlyweds to watch the house.
“Hey, hey, your dad and mom came to the wedding, and even your husband’s older brother did too. I’m grateful for that.”
When Yuki-kun pats my head, I pretend to sulk and snuggle up even closer.
“Besides, your dad and mom said it too, but it seems like they were being considerate of us…”
Yuki-kun says that shyly.
That’s about how my mom said, “Isn’t it romantic that your wedding night is in the same place as your first time?” when we were leaving, and how my dad said, “Well then, Yuki-kun, sorry about this, but I’ll have you watch the house and make us a new grandchild in one shot,” right?
That’s not it, Yuki-kun. That’s not consideration, they’re definitely just having fun with it. And how do they even know about our first time from back then?
While thinking I’ll scold my mom properly next time, for now I rub my cheek against Yuki-kun’s flushed cheek.
“Nfufufu, well then, shall we watch the video?”
“Ah, yeah, let’s watch it.”
A satisfied me and an embarrassed Yuki-kun snuggle together on the sofa as we start watching the wedding video on the living room TV.
Partway through, Yuki-kun wraps his arm around me and pulls my shoulder close. It feels completely natural, and when I look at his face, it seems unconscious. That makes me happy and ticklish.
“Huh?”
Right then, I suddenly think of something.
“Hey, Yuki-kun, hasn’t something like this happened before?”
“Hm, something like this?”
We’re staring at each other from really close, and I almost want to close my eyes and stick out my lips, but I hold back for now.
“Yeah, um? Haven’t we watched TV or movies together like this before?”
“Hm? We’ve watched TV and movies at my place, at Kanae’s place, and even at the theater, haven’t we…”
Yeah, that’s true. Especially movie theaters, I’ve only ever gone with Yuki-kun, aside from my parents.
But that’s not what I mean.
“No, not like that. I mean like right now, with me and you pressed together, leaning against each other, watching TV here in this living room…”
“Here…?”
Yuki-kun thinks about it seriously.
When could this memory be from? I don’t have any idea myself, and yet there’s an image firmly burned into my mind.
A memory of watching TV together in this living room while Yuki-kun holds my shoulder.
“Hmm, sorry. I can’t think of anything…”
Same for me. Since long ago, whenever Yuki-kun came over to my place to hang out, he’d always come to my room, and when we ate meals or the sweets I made, it was in the dining room.
And watching TV in the living room while he held my shoulder would be something from after we started dating. Even back in high school, when Yuki-kun stayed over and helped watch the house with me, I don’t remember doing anything like that.
“Yeah… I guess so. But somehow…”
That memory I don’t even know the timing of overlaps with the present me and Yuki-kun, and my chest tightens.
A scene I must’ve seen someday is here right now, and it makes me so happy. My heart trembles, and I feel like I’m about to cry for no clear reason.
“Kanae?”
“Nng… no, ehehe, it’s nothing, okay?”
Saying that, I press my face against Yuki-kun’s chest, and the familiar scent and warmth soothe me with relief.
There really were so many things that happened before Yuki-kun and I could be this close.
At first, I rejected Yuki-kun even though he went to the trouble of confessing. Then I realized my true feelings, panicked and rushed and got jealous, pressed and pressed him, and this time I made a really pathetic confession from my side. Even so, he made me his girlfriend.
Like that, countless coincidences, words, and feelings piled up, and from childhood friends to lovers, from lovers to fiancés, from fiancés to… I think we finally caught up to the scene from that memory I once saw.
And I’m sure that the me from that time also wished for and dreamed of this very scene deep in her heart.
I press myself tightly against Yuki-kun as he holds my shoulder, and whisper to him.
“Ehehe, it came true…”
To the me from long ago, who saw this scene someday.
The end.