Chapter 55: Shinjou Saya 4
Ever since Yuuki-kun joined the student council, I’d been incredibly happy.
Before that, I’d been bullied, envied over every little thing, and put up on a pedestal, which made everything hard. But as long as Yuuki-kun was there, just that alone made school fun and gave me a reason to come every day.
The bullying stopped, and while the same old things remained, like being saddled with convenient responsibilities in the name of trust from classmates and receiving random, unsolicited affection from boys, I was happier than I’d ever been before.
I think a big reason for that was that I could be honest when I was with Yuuki-kun.
He was the one person around whom I could take off the mask of the beautiful, capable, well-mannered student council president.
He accepted me with a gentle smile without ever being disappointed in me.
“Good work today too, Saya-senpai.”
“Thank you too, Yuuki-kun. I dragged you along with my selfishness again.”
“It’s fine. Being relied on makes me happy. If I can be of help to you, Saya-senpai, that’s enough.”
Yuuki-kun would sometimes say things like that, lines people would call cheesy, without the slightest embarrassment and as casually as breathing.
I couldn’t count how many times those words made my heart race.
I was living such happy days, but one day, I heard a certain rumor.
“Mikage Yuuki is a perverted groper.”
That kind of rumor started spreading all over the school.
But at the time, I naturally didn’t believe such slander.
“Yuuki-kun. It’s okay. I don’t believe that kind of rumor at all. You’re fine.”
“Th-thank you very much.”
Yuuki-kun was anxious and frightened, but when he took the hand I offered him, he seemed to relax.
At that time, I could say with confidence that Yuuki-kun hadn’t done anything like that.
It hadn’t been long, but he’d saved me from bullying, and after that, there were all the conversations we’d shared and the student council work we’d done together.
There were so many unforgettable memories.
That’s why I believed in Yuuki-kun.
I was sure that I liked him and believed in him.
…Looking back now, maybe at that time I was playing the role of the kind student council president who stood by Yuuki-kun while he was being bullied and surrounded by strange rumors.
Maybe there was just a tiny bit of that calculating thought buried deep in my heart.
In the end, maybe I was selfish, caring more about how I looked to others, and just a little bit, I might’ve been seeing the Yuuki-kun right in front of me as a convenient tool for maintaining who Shinjou Saya was.
That’s why… that’s why I think I probably couldn’t truly believe.
“Shinjou-san, have you heard the rumors about Mikage?”
“Isn’t it bad? I heard he molested someone. You should be careful.”
“There’s even a rumor that he steals girls’ gym clothes.”
While Yuuki-kun was away, the male members of the student council kept feeding me things like this over and over.
Of course, I firmly shot back that there was no way Yuuki-kun would ever do something like that.
But even in my class,
“Are you okay? He hasn’t done anything to you, has he?”
And.
“If anything happens, I’ll help you.”
people kept saying things like that to me nonstop.
I kept being told that Yuuki-kun was a perverted groper, a dangerous person.
What if… I started thinking that way.
I could feel a small seed of doubt swelling and growing.
I started to think that maybe Yuuki-kun really was doing things like that.
I even had the stupid thought that maybe the bad rumors from when he was in elementary school were true too.
Maybe even saving me from bullying had some kind of ulterior motive.
“Saya-senpai?”
“…What’s wrong?”
“I just thought you might be lost in thought.”
“I’m fine. Yeah.”
Yuuki-kun was worried about me.
And yet, I’d even started wondering what he was really thinking underneath it all, even though he was just genuinely worried about me, without any hidden intentions.
I should’ve just believed in Yuuki-kun alone.
If I’d only done that, I wouldn’t be suffering like this now.
I could’ve stayed happy.